Maine coon cat Max: His Story

Alright, get your tissues ready. I'm geared up to talk to you about Maxwel, Maximilian the Grrreat, Maxine (because he sounds like a girl), Maxi, etc. Our newly adopted main coon cat.

MAX in the shower

Momma was coming home from the animal shelter and she was supposed to bring home a large Akita and German Shepherd mix, Darla--only. Well, as it turns out, when M goes to the pound, ya never know what she'll bring home. So, I wasn't terribly surpised when she got out of the car, Darla's leash in hand and a huge box in the other. What was that box doing there and what was in it?

As M was leaving the shelter with her daughter, my beloved Sissy D, they discovered that one of the cat cages had a notice on it. Of course they rushed in the office to enquire. Max's hours were numbered. Momma tried to plead with the shelter, to give her 'till Monday (it was a weekend), but they shook their heads and confirmed that Max would NOT be around on Monday.

"Well, in that case, wrap him up!" M is decisive that way. Apparently, not only was Max "too old", he was eight, he had also been adopted out once. He had made it to the parking lot. Between the animal shelter and the lot he had apparently coughed up such an enormous cough ball that the lady turned around in her heels and returned him! OMD the fool!

It was July of 2008 the day M brought Max home. She hadn't even seen him at the animal shelter, not a glimpse. He had been curled up at the back of his cage at the shelter and he was barely visible. We all got to see him for the first time when he started coming out of his box, and coming, and coming, there was no end to this dude. Max is enormous! I now know that it's normal for a maine coon cat. He's much bigger than me, no surprise there, but he's also much bigger than the twins, the catnip addicts, Bob and Jet.

Max was covered in poo and we all held out breaths at both his beauty and his stench. M took care of the latter and we could all breathe again. Underneath the poo was one of the most gorgeous kats we'd ever seen.

This is Max the day he came home.

The face! This dude was not supposed to enjoy life any longer? What?!

See the "M" shape over his eyes? We think he's a Maine Coon Cat

The problems with Max became obvious immediately. M would occasionally and half-heartedly try to find him another home. I'd hear her on the phone: "I'm looking for a home for Max. He's awesome. He's the best. We should all adopt a pet. You can only have him if you really want him, because I want to keep him. Plus he has a couple of health issues. I love him sooo! Are you sure you can provide him with the best home, because actually, no, never mind, I want him." Needless to say, nobody dared adopt Max from my mom. But there was also no controlling the twins, out tailless cats. They hated. The reason? I personally believe they're still afraid of him. It's been a year and a half since then, but things haven't changed much. We've seen very little blood, and their fights are a mockery, but they do not get along. M got a bunch of feline anti-anxiety sprays, some herbal potions, and she did everything the experts said, but it didn't make a difference. M had a personal problem with Max too. He didn't want her. She'd try to pet him, and he'd worm away. She'd find him lying about contented, attempt to touch him, and he'd move. I could see the disappointment in her face. The worst part was, that when my human siblings would visit, Max was all over them, begging to be petted. What's up with that cat behavior? M is a charmer (with animals mainly, don't get me wrong), where was her mojo? My guess is her mojo left along with that first poo she had to clean off him.

Rescue Maine Coon Cat in his bed on his bed in his own bedroom

We lived like this for eighteen months, when M decided to get Max an As Seen on TV EmeryCat Scratch Board. Scratch boards are Max's passion, plus he hates having his nails clipped. So, M ordered him two and held her breath. Would they work on Max's nails? Would they make him happier? The Emery Boards finally arrived. They came with a kitty toy, that Max loves and two cheap looking de-shedder tools. Hmmm, M put the tools aside. She's got the Furminator and she loves it, even though Max winces and tries to squiggle away from her, somehow they were getting the hang of it. Golly, this almost sounds like a review, but I can't tell you much about the Emery yet. I need more time to have a educated opinion. Anyhow, the cheap looking de-shedders were abandoned in some kitchen drawer, until ...

Happy Max The Yogi

Friday night, a long time after we adopted Max from the animal shelter, we were all hanging in the living room, and what do I see? Max is all over M being brushed with the de-shedder and purring loudly. I guess Max didn't like the Furminator, his loss. M was mesmerized while Max was hypnotized. They remained there for about half an hour, while Bob made uneasy circles around them, vocalizing his frustration. Frankie put an end to it. She got fed up. She went up to Max's face and yelped "My turn!". He got the message and left to play with the fluffy cat toy that came with his EmeryCat. I have never seen a shinier kat. I have never seen Max more content. As for me, I'm a lady, and I patiently remained on my heating pad from where I observed all I just recounted, even though, between us, I was dying for my turn!

There's a feeling of tranquility in my home that wasn't there before. I want to believe that the Max-saga is coming to a fast end. We want him not just alive, but happy too, and he's finally getting it. What can I say, katz may be able to catch birds in the air, but when it comes down to their IQ, they are slower than k9s. Oh, I can also say that EmeryCat's de-shedders get an A+ from me, as does the Furminator for the rest of us. 

Twink!