Dear Twinkie

Dog Advice Column

Martine asked...

Tuesdays are now our favorite day of the week! The kiddlets appreciate your great advice and have been reassured they will still exist after the peanut comes... that is if he makes his debut! Now a question from Caps: to get more attention is it ok to act totally crazy and out of control when I visit the potty park? also, what do you think it means that I want to jump on any dog that weights at least 200x more than I do?

TVT: The "peanut debut" BOL Nicely put. Oh, Captain, my captain... I've seen your wonderful youtube videos and there's no way I'd ever discourage you from your cracker-life-style. We teenies are brave at heart and full of energy. Yes, by all means, go nuts and jump on any dog you can reach! For the ones you can't reach, I suggest a ramp or a set of steps, which incidentally you can use to go over the new roadblocks in your own home. 

mayziegal asked...

Dear Twinkie Yo Yo Ma Chico Bandito, I thinks you did another real outstanding job on your advice column. You're like Dr. Laura only less scary and mean. My question is, in two weeks, I haves to take my high school graduation test and I'm real afraids I might flunk it. What should I do if I gets stuck on an answer? Mom says it's wrong to cheat.
Wiggles & Wags,
Mayzie

TVT: Yo, Mayzie, I realize there's an extra degree of difficulty since you left me this question, seeing that your mommy is all the way in Nooor Kitty. Do not worry one bit. If Frankie can do it, you can do it, and it looks as if Frankie will be graduating and getting her CGC around the same time you do. After all I know you'll be getting extra cheese from dad while mom is out of town, and that will definitely help with your self esteem and focus. 

My mom says that even though cheating is wrong, sometimes it's necessary, especially when it's regarding school. In your case though, you don't even need to cheat. Just be yourself and relax. Don't forget to share the good news, when you ace it!

3 doxies asked...

Twink, I did finds my thinking cap and I dids come back and askeded you a question...hmmmmm. Maybes your fish oil hasn't kicked in either...hehehehe!
Puddles

TVT: ??? I am very confused, but I believe it's Blogger we can both blame for this. I do empathize with you. I've lost many comments throughout my blogging career. 

Ruby and Penny asked...

Hi ........Twinkerson , you fill in the blanks. We love reading your advice. Do you have any advice for us?
Love Ruby & Penny

TVT: As a matter of fact, I do. I don't like the sound of that Nickel dude. I mean, you're just furiends, right? You will never find a better husband than our Frankie Furter. Stay true to your man and enjoy Date Night for now. Did you see how your Frankie asked Daisy's dad NOT to be kissing him? I rest my case.

Benny and Lily asked...

Twink with such a long beautiful name, why are you a TV news reporter. We have those people with long names here in L.A. BOL
Benny & Lily

TVT: That is why I changed it to Twinkie Van Twinkerson--my pen name!

Dog Foster Mom asked...

Dear Twinkie Maria Conchita Espenoza Cucaracha Doodle-Bug Chupa Cabra Twinkerson, we (me, Remi, Noelle, Merlin, and current foster pets) all really enjoy reading your advice column each week. Noelle has a question for you. She wants to know if its okay to keep doing zoomies even though she is now a mature adult at 1 and a half years old. She doesn't want the foster dogs to lose respect for her if she still acts like a puppy. Can you please give her some advice

TVT: I believe you should continue enjoying your zoomies for as long as you can. I mean, think about it. It was barking, your breed, physical handicap, and naughty behavior that ensured your forever home almost a year ago. Zoom away and be grateful every minute. And if the other fosters don't get it, too bad for them. 

Lorenza asked...

Hi, Dear Twinkie Marie Conchita Espenoza Cucaracha Doodle-bug Chupa Cabra Twinkerson! I wonder why I always forget my question when I finish writting your name! Haaa! Kisses and hugs, Lorenza

TVT: I would normally recommend fish oil supplements, but not for your case. I believe you're distracted by the revenges and the dresses. Another major disruptive factor in your life is the fabulous auntie! 

Cocorue asked...

dear dear TwinkieMCECDCCTwinkerson, you are one dang smart Chi and i don't say that lightly......do YOU think there's a WaWaLand? go figure and find a way to stop my mumster embarrasing me ALL the time! NO ONE has ever picked that up or they were too dang polite to ask BOL BOL BOL!
My NEXT Q: do you think i can sell my mumster on eBay? i have never seen a 2legger being sold at auction. Awaiting your wise answer as the sooner i sell her, the better returns i will get as i think her SELL OUT date is expiring!
chikisses
coco

TVT: I found wawaland! (but don't click if you scare easily) There's a supersized photo of a blond chocking a tiny chi. Your NEXT Q is really easy to answer. Of course I had to do a little "borrowing" but I think my furiends Loki and Juno will not be offended (not sure about their dad).  Thanks to Wild Dingo, I present you with a model 2-legger ebay add. 

And if he doesn't sell out of pity,

I bet he'll sell for top $$$ for his grrreat sense of humor!!!

Mack and Sally Ann asked...

Your advice is great, but my question is, do you let your sisters help with the advice. I know your Italian sister is older, so does she help?
Sally Ann

TVT: My dearest Sally Ann, I'll answer any question from your lovely self. I guess I forgot to mention, but my older Italian sister is just older. She's not wiser. Plus, she doesn't speak but a couple of words in English. The biggest help I can expect from both my sissies is their not tooting when I'm working on the computer. 

Mr Koda MD asked...

Dearest Twinkie Marie Conchita Espenoza Cucaracha Doodle-bug Chupa Cabra Twinkerson - yet another genius instalment! A question if I may: Howcome when a dog chases a cat.. and the cat stops, turns around and swipes with the razor paws.. that I end up feeling like my schnoz is on fire? Please help! Koda

TVT: I consulted with Linguini who is usually the one with the bloody nose. She said to trim the kitty's lethal weapons and if that doesn't do it, put on the acrylic nails to embarrass her. That should keep the cat-astrophic kitties away from you and the burning sensation with them.

Take THIS, kitty!

RILEY AND STAR asked...

Hi Twink, whenever hoomans come to visit, I am excited to see them and my head starts spinning around like Linda Blaire in the Exorcist. Do you think this is unusual behavior for a furrendly pup like me? I'm starting to get a complex! Thanks!
Your pal, Riley

TVT: I believe your problem is rooted even deeper than you imagine. It's probably a reflection of your angst when Star T.P.d the bathroom and mentioned you as her accomplice.  I suggest that next time you're expecting guests, you do five minutes of neck warm up exercises. All I care about is that you don't come unhinged. And don't forget, unless you start throwing up like Linda Blair, humans will find you adorable. Friendlier pups have done worse. My chiweenie sissy still pees on our guests out of her overt friendliness; and that's when she's not twirling mid air. 

It was my birthday yesterday

Luckily, I have many wonderful FaceBook friends who reminded M. She was surprised at first, but then she turned all emo on me. She never thought I'd make it this far. I must say, I had my doubts too. Frankie, my Chiweenie sissy, played a big part in this. In my efforts to keep up with the little brat, I got healthier than I've ever been. I hope I'm around for a long time, but if not, I have a looong list of furiends waiting for me at the bridge and I'm looking forward to that too. Life is good! Hasta la vista, baby!!!

Now go take on the day!

Twinkie

Monday's Dog Training Tips | How to train a Greyhound

Enough joking around. Today, I mean business and I'm here to share some serious dog training tips. I will demonstrate that size does not matter and that designer dogs aren't any smarter than purebred dogs.

I was playing by the side of a "river" when I spotted trouble on the other bank. My Chiweenie sissy was in need of my help. Dog training tip #1: Look fearless. This way, even if you look pathetic like me, you at least surprise your opponent.

Like superman, bum leg flying off to my side, I dove into the raging rapids

"I'm coming, Frankie!" I yelled, swallowing more water with each breath I took

Have no fear! Twinkie's here!

One final leap and I was almost there

Frankie was screaming for her life because Mabel, our good old furiend, was looking at her. I tell you, designer dogs can be quirky, especially the Chiweenie type. As for Mabel, she's a fancy mix herself. She is a Rottweiler and Greyhound cross. Dog training tip #2: Stand your ground and take advantage of the voice Dog gave you. 

The minute I landed on the other side of the river, I let the Greyhound - Rottweiler have an earful. "And don't you ever look at my sister again!" I said in the highest pitch ever known to Chihuahuas, especially considering I'm a tea cup chihuahua

She leaned a bit closer, probably because she couldn't hear me well from that high up

Frankie the Chiweenie, or Chicken Weenie, was inching away

"Run, Frankie, run," I yelled, while staring Mabel down

The Chiweenie didn't get far. She did feel braver though and she learned a lot from me that day. I sure hope you enjoyed my latest dog training tips.

* * *

I've been so busy recently, I still haven't had a chance to visit the Global Animal Blogging Event links to see if I won any of our free giveaways. I can't wait and I'll do it first chance I get! Bottom line, we're all winners just for participating and making new friendships. 

The Date Night over at Twix's is turning into the event of the century. It's fun, unpredictable and hilarious. Look what they did with me and my Gunther!

"Twinkie and Gunther stopped at the beach before heading over. I heard she might put her bikini back on later and go swimming in the toilet!"

The happy couple! BOL

Warning: Please check first before flashing toilet

Have a wonderful week!

Twinkie

Global Animal Blogging Event Is Over | Free Giveaways

Drawing #1,917 ENTRANT ACCESSIBLE

Global Animal Blogging Event 2010 2nd drawing held by Twinkie The Tiny Dog - Dog Training Tips Completed on Sunday, 18 April 2010 at 16:51:25 UTC 59 entrants, 3 winners Winners (3) 1st: Piappies World 2nd: Ina in Alaska 3rd: Missy Rey

I interrupt my latest dog training tips to announce that the first ever Global Animal Blogging Event has come to an end. It's been a blast. The best part for me was watching the newer blogs' friend lists grow and grow along with their comments. All the feedback I've received has been positive and I am grateful for each and all your lovely remarks. I never expected so much personal publicity and links. I was truly humbled and self conscious, but then I got it. It was your way of saying, thank you. Well, I thank you all back! You were wonderful! 

The event may be over, for now, but your links will be revisited as it happens with all of this type of events. Active participants, make sure you post and contact the winners of your free giveaways today. 

One final huge "thank you" to Ann from Zoolatry for making the most appropriate, stylish, classy, smart, and vibrant logo!

An event like G.A.B.E. does not exactly take off during its first year. It picks up momentum and traffic as it becomes established, but I think we did a fine job launching it. I'm looking forward to Global Animal Blogging Event 2011!!!

Cheers to all my friends, old and new, and to the winners!

Twinkie, your grateful hostess

Dalmatian | German Shorthaired Pointer

I am obsessing over designer dogs, so when a friend pointed out Linguini's absence from the blog, I immediately felt the need to oblige thus sticking with my recent "designer dogs" theme.

Designer dogs? Huh?

Linguini's story started at the Pasadena Humane Society, an animal shelter. M had one dog, Rosie, a chocolate lab, and didn't want another at the time. She wasn't into rescuing yet. She did however lose her cat and while looking at the pound for her, spotted ... the spotted Dalmatian. Now all puppies are adorable, and Dalmatian puppies are no exception, but Linguini was different. M was told that Linguini was a German Shorthaired Pointer and Dalmatian mix.

Who needs Dalmatian puppies, when you can find a fine specimen of a

Dalmatian and German Shorthaired Pointer mix?

Linguini is proud to be a mutt

I already consulted my precious "designer dogs" list and there was no special term for our Linguini. BTW Linguini was initially named Daisy to match our Rosie. She was no dainty Daisy, but she did move like a wet noodle, so she was renamed Linguini shortly after her adoption.

"Daisy" and Rosie

Linguini and Rosie appeared to be two peas in a pod. Wrong! M was fooled, and, as soon as she let her guard down, Rosie attacked Linguini and ripped her throat. Linguini was hospitalized for a while and later spent a month recovering at home with a tube sticking out her throat. She required around the clock care. She recovered in the end, but only after losing control of her bladder for a couple more years.

About three years later, Rosie got killed, but I'm not allowed to talk about that. Linguini regained control of her bladder, which made life easier on everybody. She decided she was going to be an escape artist next and soon was nicknamed Houdini. There was no stopping her. The pound pounded our door many times to demand that we take control. They threatened with fines, taking her away, putting her down (OMD), but Linguini didn't care. M mounted a 60 foot tether in our back yard, by the pond and had to keep Linguini tied whenever she wasn't around. Needless to say M and Linguini were both miserable. 

Can you see the German Shorthaired Pointer in her? 

Other than the fact that she frequently and clearly points, we can't see it

Linguini is a happy dog that wants to please. If a human looks at her she falls on her back to get a belly rub. She's peace-loving and never cared to interact much with other dogs. Until recently. 

This is Sue, Linguini's BFF

Sue doesn't make friends very easily either, but those two had their own chemistry going. Funny story, Sue playfully bumped Linguini while horsing around the other day and Linguini was airborne! Rhodies are tough and strong. No hard feelings of course. Anything goes during playtime. Sue and Linguini have set their own boundaries. They visit each other's homes, hang, share toys and marrow bones... When you see a loner take to another dog the way those two did, it's magic. 

Happy spotted dog, um, Dalmatian, um, mutt

The minute I joined the family, Linguini was gentle with me. She would run towards me, but as she approached, she'd take tiny leaps to make sure she didn't hurt me. I'll never forget that. For a couple of years, we shared the home as the only dogs, peacefully, each doing her thing. 

When Frankie, the "Chiweenie" joined us, I thought, "this is it!" Frankie was constantly hanging from Linguini's face, jumping on her, tugging on her ears with her sharp puppy teeth, and I was sure that one day she'd become appetizer. It never happened. The worst thing Linguini's ever done to Frankie is a low warning growl, but the brat doesn't care anyways.

This is Linguini now

She loves to spend her days by M's feet

The closer to M, the happier she is

She enjoys sharing whipped cream with her pack

She loves food and has become a skilled counter surfer! 

As if Linguini's life hadn't been complicated enough, when she was about to turn ten, about a year ago, she started getting sick. She had difficulty getting up, her energy was low, and M took her for a check up. She had several dog tumors (benign) and her liver and thyroid functions were slightly compromised. M changed her diet, put her on a joint juice, and started exercising her religiously. Ta-da! A brand new Dalmatian/German Shorthaired Pointer was born. 

Our new dog

Linguini's health is restored for now, and a year later she hikes, swims, loves her visit to the horse barn, and has a bestie. She's constantly happy and the other day she even caught a bird, to M's dismay (only a couple of weeks ago spotted dog had caught a gofer). 

Gorgeous!

When Linguini was sick, last year, M told her, "I gave you ten good years, you owe me at least that many." I think Linguini got it!

As we all well know, it's not about quantity but quality. We all love her and appreciate every moment we have left with her. That was the story of my sissy, the gentle and happy Dalmatian/German Shorthaired Pointer mutt! 

 

Last Global Animal Blogging Event day!
Don't forget to leave comments to be eligible for the free giveaways!

Twinkie

Chiweenie Friday (14) - Dog Training Tips...

Hello! Frankie here, the Chiweenie, that's what I'm used to. I don't know what to do about all this Italian Greyhuahua information. I surviveded another week and I'm here to tell you about it. Twinkie's been talking a lot about dog training tips, so I decided to take you to school with me and learn what to avoid.

This is what I see every time I go to school

I only get those a-after class, when I've been good

This is me, the Chiweenie, at the beginning of class

Here's beautiful, playful, and oh-so-smart, Roxie

A new member, Heidi

Can you believe she was the runt of her litter? I do

She's really dainty and perky

Here's Olga (front)

Olga's rear end

No, she's not a Shar- Pei, she's going to grow into those folds

And ... me

Olga and Roxie playing

A furiendly pow-wow/sniffer galore

And me

Olga left early

I would have waved bye-bye

But I was stuck underneath a chair

I did wave bye-bye to the dog treat bar though

After the way I behaved again, I knew I could only wave from far away

As if life wasn't tough enough, the new joke is: Frankie's a Chiweenie, as in Chicken and Weenie. Not BOL. 

Have a not bad day at all!!!

Frankie, The Chiweenie

Dog Beach and Dog Training Tips from Malibu, CA

I seriously couldn't wait to post about my first dog beach excursion ever! I was so excited that I even allowed M to dress me up in a soft fleece shirt that says Doggone Gorgeous! The weather was wonderful, a bit on the cool side, but the nice warm sun made all the difference. The sand was superb! As soon as we got there, Frankie and I started doing the bunny hop. What do you call two designer dogs enjoying a day at the dog beach?

Chihuahua bunny hop

aka Chibunny

Italian Greyhuahua bunny hop

aka Chitalian Bun Bun

Another pawesome, in my opinion, designer dog name

Dog training tips: If you sense your human's hesitation before taking you off leash, heel. Act like the most obedient walker and see if it works. It works for me most of the time. Also, allow your humans some personal satisfaction by doing something new and unusual. For example, I wore a shirt. That makes your humans think that they trust you more. BOL

I had no idea that a dog beach can be so vast. I was pleased and not intimidated, and apparently so was Frankie. 

I felt so tiny!

And so did Frankie

We didn't mind one bit though. After the first bunny hops near M, we just let loose. Dog training tips, continued: Don't forget to stick by your humans, at first! After a few minutes, do as you please. They can only whistle so loud.

I had no idea the dog beach was such a romantic place

Or such a spiritual one

(Frankie's praying again)

Surprise, surprise, M only had on her two digital photo cameras and her flip cam! At one point, she was trying to hoax Frankie and me to join her closer to the water, so she could shoot video. A big wave came and got her soaking wet, boots and everything, all the way up to her waist. She almost got drawn into the water, but she claims she stayed as balanced as she could and didn't get tumbled around because she was holding onto her flip cam. We don't have that most entertaining video to share, but we have the next best thing: Twinkie and Frankie at the Malibu dog beach! 

Before I go, I want to remind our furiends that Toby has left and his raiser could use our support!

And while my date has been MIA and not asked me yet to Date Night, this won't stop me from reminding our furiends that Date Night is happening over at Twix's. 

Last, Global Animal Blogging Event still in process, until midnight on Saturday. Sunday we get to spread the  joy by contacting our winners about their free giveaways!

Twinkie

Dog Beach | Dog Training Tips | Bonus Restaurant Reviews

My family has been too busy recently and we haven't really had a day off in a while. When M was invited to Gladstone's of Malibu for lunch yesterday, she decided she could use a little time off, so she grabbed Frankie and me and off we went. We went to Malibu and more specifically Gladsone's, a landmark restaurant.

Warning: under new management

Finding a dog beach was not a priority since M isn't one to obey rules. She even snuck us inside the restaurant. Sorry, no photos available since we were "under cover". All you need to know is, the carry-on's zipper often came undone as M's hand offered us dog treats from the table. [Dog training tip #1: always behave and softly gaze upon the diners lovingly] Yum! I wasn't too anxious to get to the dog beach since I was already in heaven nibbling on calamari.

We moved outside to enjoy the sunshine and cool breeze and to allow us, the smuggled ones, to stretch our limbs. [Dog training tip #2: gently stretch inside the carry on, demonstrating how restricted your movement is, and don't forget the adorable look] M and company were discussing the Pacific Coast Highway robbery after receiving an abominable  price gouging that was as offensive as the entire experience, with the exception of our skilled and sweet waitress.

Oh, the sun felt good!

It had been heated from the sun and doubled as a most appropriate heating pad alternative

Of course, the brat had to scope out the situation first

What if there were any Chimeanies around?

Yikes, she finally emerged and blocked my sun

[Dog training tip #3: look exasperated and some human will oblige and remove the "obstacle" as they did with Frankie! I tell you, these dog training tips work!]

After we got kicked out of the deck, because Gladstone's of Malibu has become a rather unfriendly place under their new management, and I don't mean just to us dogs, we moved down to the beach. There were no signs that required us to be on leash, so Frankie and I went wild. It was our first visit to the beach ever! [Dog training tip #4: look longingly towards the direction you want your humans to take you, over and over, until you catch their eye]

Hasta la vista, Gladstone's of Malibu

I'll share more about it and specifically the dog beach tomorrow, but I think I made my point. Forget the old glorious Gladstone's of Malibu (aka Gladstone's 4 Fish). It's gone. Heck, even the staple peanuts they offered by the barrel are gone. For those who have never been, let me explain that Gladstone's used to be a pretty simple beach restaurant with a hippy vibe and a ton of peanut shells all over the ground. With the peanuts gone and the silly rules that vary from one area of the establishment to the next, it's become just a plain tourist trap, and we're no tourists! We're all informed bloggers. 

Twinkie