It's a dog blog, a cat blog, a cat and dog blog. Fun, reviews, dog training tips . . .

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Attention Insane Cracker Dogs

The honorable Judge Twink presiding

Ehem, you may be seated.
This post marks the opening of my arbitrary and preprepreliminary scoring of some of the INSANE CRACKER DOG CATEGORY entries in

Warning:
Scoring rules may change at any time based on my SOLE discretion
Best possible score: 5
Worst possible score: -5
Extra points are in units and are based on bribes


Contestant #1
CHARLIE
Definition of Category (how well you fit in it)
5p for having been born "crackers". Congrats
5p for messing with the kitteh
5p for histrionics
Energy Level of Participan and of Post
5p for blurry action photos
3p for mellowing down "a bit"
6p because your pawrents are crackers too (runs in the family)
Level of Destruction
4p for not showing enough stuffy guts (the zoomies inside and out helped this score)
+5p for praising Mango Minster and saying it's a "dog competition like no other"
-5p for saying Mango Minster is a "dog competition like no other". I organize a yearly dog contest myself, duh!
Random and Arbitrary Bonus and Bogus Points
+1 for excellent friend-greeting technique
-1 for pathetic bark 
+1 vocals
Bribes
meep!


Contestant #2
JAZZI
Definition of Category (how well you fit in it)
5p for being born a terrier, kudos
5p for demolishing them tacos, slurp
Energy Level of Participan and of Post
5p for jumping shot
  4p because there's only one jumping shot
Level of Destruction
4p for eating taco upside down challenge
5p for eating the taco, slurp

Random and Arbitrary Bonus and Bogus Points
+5 for being a loyal ol' blog pal of mine. I love you man!
Bribes
meep! (let's work on that, buddy)



Contestant #3
Definition of Category (how well you fit in it)
5p for being so crackers
5p for serious hose attack, bravo!
4p for doubting your insanity at the end
Energy Level of Participan and of Post
5p Overall reaction
-1p I had to deduct a point for the "normal" shot
Level of Destruction
4p for or excellent opening. I would have given you a 5 but you only destroyed one stuffy.
Random and Arbitrary Bonus and Bogus Points
+2 for detox
+1 for training your humans
-2 because your furry tail didn't leave the ground
Bribes
+2 out of possible 100s. The items you offered are of no significant use to me, plus most of them were obviously used and there wasn't an ounce of marrow left in those bones for me. Tsk tsk

I'm feeling frustrated now, so I'm going to go chew on some of my own bully sticks.


Court is adjourned for the day

Twinkie V. Twinkerson

United Pet Blogdom District Judge

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