Puff Doggie!

You've all heard about Puff Daddy, but 

Puff Doggie, huh?

Our senior spotted dog, Linguini, did it again. She had us rushing to the dog vet once more. We didn't fear the worst this time. We're all becoming accustomed to the odd things that are happening to her. WTD?!

 Within a few minutes, our beloved Linguini's forehead went from this to . . .

. . . THIS!

The dog vet discovered it was an abscess. Spotted senior dog's abscess was drained by syringe and she was sent home with antibiotics strong enough for a horse. Of course, she hurled them. M's got a grip by now. She adds some probiotics and a bit of yogurt to Linguini's food, waits a few minutes after each meal and then gives her the antibiotic. She's also, as per the vet's instructions, doing hot compresses three times a day. 

Our girl's health is improving fast!

Twink!

Lack Of Dignity

Dog food is good, 

dog treats are great,

but human food is extra special.

When M feeds us hot dogs . . . what can I say, we all lose a bit of our dignity. It's the spotted senior girl though that embarasses herself the most. Check out the progression of "Das Slobber"

Where is your dignity, ol' lady?

BOL

For the record: She enjoyed 3 whole hot dogs 

(shhh, don't tell her dog vet)

Twinkie

Attention Spaghetti's Friends

Ooops, I meant to say, Linguini's friends. This past weekend, our spotted girl, Linguini, the 11.5 year old dalmatian mix, became severely ill--notice it was the weekend again. She developed incontinence of . . . oh well, all orifices.
First thing Monday morning, we took her to the dog vet.  After a thorough check up, including a liver panel to make sure that the Rimadyl she's on long term did not cause any damage, Linguini was pronounced quite healthy (considering her advanced dog arthritis). She was prescribed  stronger pain meds to be taken sparingly ONLY as needed. She was also prescribed an anti-inflamatory drug to keep her from having dog diarrhea. She was already on DES for her incontinence, but her dosage was increased.
We're still waiting for the culture, but for now the dog vet was pretty clear:

Diagnosis

DRAMA QUEEN

The Happy End

Twink!

Pedrito Is Becoming A Man Hoy

After grave misbehavior over the weekend, we made an emergency appointment with the dog vet and our little bro is getting neutered.

Spay and Neuter

Twink!

Dog Arthritis And Blown Cruciate Update

(continued from yesterday)

Our dalmatian mix's blood test results came in, and meanwhile we were also able to locate what was making her so violently ill. It was the medication (hormone) that we had her on for her dog incontinence. Linguini had a rare reaction to Proin (phenylpropanolamine). We have already taken her off it and later, after her health has improved, we'll start looking at alternatives. The mop and bucket (along with bleach and Nature's Miracle) will have to replace the Proin for the time being. That's all good news since she hasn't thrown up once in the past 24 hours. She's already getting stronger.

The limp is a totally unrelated situation we need to tackle. We're going to give Linguini a couple more days to recover from the reaction to Proin and then put her on Rimadyl twice a day for a week. At the end of that time period, we will reconvene with the dog vet and decide for or against surgery. There is still a slight chance that the cruciate is partially torn versus completely blown. If it's partially torn and it's the dog arthritis that is mainly acting up, surgery will be postponed indefinitely to spare the senior dog from going under anesthesia.

I got some comments about dog glucosamine and chondroitin versus Rimadyl. I am grateful for all feedback, but in this dog's case, supplements will not suffice. She's already been on glucosamine for dogs, and on chondroitin,  and on fish oil for dogs. Supplements are always preferable to medication, but only when drugs can actually be avoided. Under the circumstances, the drug, Rimadyl, will potentially help avoid a rather involved, risky, and expensive surgery, so we have to give it a chance.

Twinkie

Dog Arthritis And Possible Rimadyl Adverse Reaction

Our Linguini, an eleven year old female dalmatian mix, has been diagnosed with dog arthritis. 

She's had arthritic type signs for a long time. Due to recent sudden weight loss accompanied by acute vomiting, we rushed her to the dog vet to find out why she was wasting away so suddenly. What was making her so ill? The Rimadyl, the fish oil for dogs, or Proin (phenylpropanolamine), the hormone to help control her dog incontinence? The vet did x-rays and ran a new blood test (her last one was ten months ago).

The telling x-ray

The above x-ray clearly shows that our girl's left leg is heavily afflicted by dog arthritis, as is her spine. Surprisingly, her right leg doesn't show any signs of dog arthritis! After a thorough physical, our dog vet added that the dog's probably suffering fro a blown cruciate and will most likely need surgery. 

We're waiting for the blood test results to come in before we decide how to proceed. We are also playing around with her medications, to figure out which one may be causing the excessive and violent vomiting (the fish oil for dogs is not a suspect at this point). The cruciate surgery is promising. The chances of full functionality are really good. There are rare complications (breakdown) with this type of surgery, but we are lucky because our dog vet happens to specialize in it. The cons are significant as well: with a senior dog there is always an elevated risk during sedation, the recovery is long, and the cost makes us wish we had heeded our own warnings an PSAs and gotten pet insurance!

To be continued . . . 

Twinkie

It's His Fault (Again)

The tiny puppy has been a major disruption. As soon as we all (cats and dogs) started recovering from the introductions with the "foster" pregnant cat and later her kittens, ta-da, tiny dog comes around and life's out of control again.

The chiweenie and I are on puppy patrol during the day,

but he still doesn't sleep through the night. 

At night, Charlie, the tuxedo kitten is in charge of puppy sitting.

The puppy only sleeps when he likes,

but that's okay because . . .

. . . at least he doubles as a pawesome hat!

( I sure hope anybody from PETA doesn't see this)

In all seriousness, this tiny two pound puppy, is a paw-full. The whole house is torn about his presence. The one who is most affected is Frankie, the chiweenie, M's barnacle dog. Frankie is torn and confused. On one paw, she is a "momma's girl" and can't stand the puppy taking up M's time, on the other, she can't resist the puppy, so she loves playing with him, when M pretends she's not looking. 

Today, puppy went for his first dog vet visit. Other than the disconcerning facts that he hasn't gained but a couple of ounces in two weeks and that the vet thinks he's a chihuahua, he checked out. He got his shots and we're all hoping he'll sleep through the night. 

Twinkie, the cranky teacup chihuahua

White House Security Breach

Third Couple Meet Obama Without Invitation

Twinkie and Frankie Van Twinkerson, Democrat supporters from California, were ushered into an invitation-only veterans breakfast with Barack and Michelle Obama after mistakenly turning up a day early for a tour of the grounds.

Unlike Tareq and Michaele Salahi, a Virginia couple who gatecrashed a White House dinner, and the Dardens' breach of protocol on Veterans' Day, Twinkie, a teacup chihuahua, and Frankie, a strange looking brindle chiweenie (there are all sorts of "interesting" looking and sounding designer dogs) claim it was not intentional on their part.
The pair said they grew increasingly mystified as they were ushered into the awesome depths of the building, but their concerns were brushed aside by officials. "We only wanted to meet Bo, another rescue dog," Twinkie barked out. "We're huge fans of Bo's blog," Frankie later added.
The White House claimed that the Van Twinkersons had been allowed into the breakfast after going through security screening as a "nice gesture" after they arrived on the wrong day for their tour.
However, the furry couple said there was no evidence that officials or the Secret Service had realized they were not on the guest list.
Ms Twinkie, age 4, a retired advice columnist, said she and her brindle  pack-mate were never told about the breakfast. "We prefer dog food, anyhow," Ms Twinkie insisted.
They believed they were simply starting their tour until they were ushered into the East Room, offered a buffet spread and told they would be meeting the president.
"The further we got into the White House, the more surprised we were," she said. "Frankie looked at me, and I looked at her, and I said, 'You know, I don't know if we're in the right place. But we were both too tiny to push our way out of there"'. When they approached a White House aide to suggest they had veered off course they were told to "just go with the flow".
"I felt kind of funny because I was the only teacup chihuahua in the room that wasn't dressed in a formal gown. I was just a plain tourist, wearing my everyday dog collar."
She said security officials had realized they were not on the list but, while their identity was being checked, they were ushered inside and joined 200 guests for a buffet breakfast. "Needless to say, the food wasn't as good as our homemade dog treats, but it was yummy!"
Another official told Ms Twinkie it was an event for vets, and, after learning Ms Twinkie and Ms Frankie had their own dog vet, he suggested they stayed.
A White House spokesman said it is not unusual for staff to take small dogs who are cleared in for tours to other events if there is space, including Marine One arrivals, East Room events and Rose Garden ceremonies.

White House officials have had to explain how a third couple managed to get inside President Barack Obama's residence for an official event without an invitation.

"They were so cute! They also promised we could enter our dogs in the Furry Tails pet photo contest," was one of the officials' responses.

America's most infamous unwanted guests showed up on NBC's Today Show.

We honesty just wanted to meet Bo and go on a dog hike, the couple insisted.

Ultimately, both Frankie and Twinkie were totally forgiven. They were also given the White House Frequent Visitor Badge

The California belles were beaming as they accepted their badge. "We were invited, not crashers. In any case, we will not be pressing any charges. My sissy and I are so glad everything's finally cleared and we can be good furiends with Bo," said Ms. Twinkie.

T--

Dog Allergies

There has been a general increase in allergies to humans and pets alike. At a seminar I recently attended, Liz Koskenmaki, DVM addressed the issue giving me plenty of information to pass on. Dr. Koskenmaki started out by saying that 50% of all her patients come due to allergies.

While she didn't discuss the cause of this phenomenon, she mentioned the three main dog allergy  causes and their manifestation. She also mentioned dog allergy treatment solutions for each cause.

The three main dog allergy causes are:

1. dog fleas
2. dog food allergies
3. environmental allergies

The patients may have ear issues, skin (yeast or bacterial infections), irritability, weight loss, and itching. For starters, the dog vet has to rule out three major things: ringworm, mites, and bacterial or yeast infections.

1. Allergies Caused by Dog Fleas

No dog is born with flea allergies. Flea allergy develops after exposure for a long period of time. That's why, according to vets, all canines should receive preventive dog flea control. Dog fleas are not easy to see, but that does not mean that your dog is free of them unless he's on medication. Dr. Koskenmaki suggested the use of Fronline Plus, Advantage, Advantix (caution: this one is toxic to cats!) as a way to prevent exposure to fleas, therefore overall avoidance of related dog skin allergies. When I questioned the current warnings against spot-on medications, she replied that the bad rep is due to formulations that come from other countries that are usually really cheap (she used Hartz as an example) that can indeed have devastating effects on our dogs. She also reassured me that overall, the "quality stuff" is still considered quite safe. She mentioned Fronline and Revolution as good choices, and that the only side effect she has personally seen from Frontline was minimal hair loss at the application site.

2. Dog Food Allergies

Dog food allergies are quite common. Many dogs are allergic to corn, byproducts, soy, added dyes . . . There are plenty of hypoallergenic dog food options to try first. If that does not solve your dog's food allergy issue, you should consider the possibility of protein allergies. It takes a dog about 3-5 years from birth to develop allergies to protein. In such cases, one can switch to lamb, venison, duck, rabbit, or fish dog food.  Another option to "test" protein allergies is to switch to hydrolyzed protein. Switching to a hydrolyzed protein diet is a way to diagnose food allergies, but it is not a diet your dog should be on long term. Remember, this diagnostic technique takes a while since it takes about 6 weeks for your dog's system to clear up. There are also blood tests available to diagnose dog food allergies, but they are not 100% correct.

3. Environmental Allergies

Environment related dog allergies are the worst. There is intradermal testing (skin testing) that shows exactly what your dog is allergic too. Based on those results, your vet can provide you with a special cocktail shot fit for your dog, but the process takes as long as 8 months.

Dog Allergy Treatment Suggestions

1. 30% of dogs will respond to antihistamines, which are found to be relatively safe to use even long term. 

2. Atopica: is an immunosuppresant drug with not too many side effects. It takes 2-4 weeks to work but it is not licensed for cats yet (although some vets do use it on cats).

3. Dog steroids: The results are instant BUT there are many side effects. They are tough on the liver and leave your dog prone to infections. 

4. Fish Oil for dogs: A great supplement that boosts the immune system, helps with dog allergies, strengthens the heart, brain, skin and nerves. 

Dog allergies are common and complicated to treat. This article should help guide you to think in the right direction or in the least in your communication with your personal vet.

New Dog Diarrhea "Treatment"

Ever since I was rescued, I've been sufferining from chronic recurring dog diarrhea. It sucked. There were long periods when I wasn't be able to eat, heck, I didn't want to eat. At 2lbs, my family would freak out and go out of their way to find something to stuff down my throat. The dog vet prescribed medications including antibiotics. Yuck! I didn't want my GI system to be slowed down. I wanted to be left alone.  Yet, every now and then, I'd be rushed to the emergency clinic for IV fluids. Those first couple of years, I was simply miserable, until I doubled my weight. At that point, M, with my help, adopted a new way of thinking: She left me alone. I weighed almost 4lbs and she felt I could afford it. I was grateful. My bouts with dog diarrhea didn't last too long. In my case, I just needed to rest and wait it out.

As of this past weekend, things have taken a new turn. Having recently gotten my pack mates and me yöghund frozen yogurt, she'd done extensive research during which she found out that yöghund was organic, low in calories, and contained good bacteria to aid in the digestion and to boost the immune system. So, when she heard my tummy growling, the first unmistakable sign that I'm suffering from upset intestines and diarrhea, instead of leaving me alone, she brought me a yöghund for breakfast!

Believe me, I had no qualms downing an entire cup of delicious frozen yogurt!

I scooped out every last drop!

It does not seem that yöghund spead up my recovery by much, but what it did is provide me with a good and healthy meal that gave me enough energy to make it though the day without the usual listlessness that used to plague me. Yoghund is not a dog diarrhea treatment per se, but it aided me. I even went on a dog hike!

I can't tell you how much I've been enjoying this new dog treat. The nice folks over at Yöghund read my last post and said they'd be sending me some coupons, but my freezer's already stocked up. I'm going to be sharing them with my readers. Stay tuned.

Twinkie

Is There A Dog Vet In The House?

Evil, possessed, mean,

life threatening, scary, leaping,
overprotective, 

feral Farrah the nursing cat mom...

got my ear today! 

 (I've booby-trapped her litter box)

That darn cat! She attacked me! How dare she?

No teacup chihuahua should ever be exposed to such violence. To make matters worse, those folks who make the Ace bandages do not make any for small dogs. Oh, and M is not fit for a nurse; she should keep her day job.

I have a scratch on my right ear.

It stings!

*This edition of "My life is a cat-astrophe" was brought to you by Twinkie Van Gogh.*

Starving Chiweenie Plea

Ever since our last dog vet visits, one thing is apparent, with me as the sole exception, the rest of the pack needs to lose weight. The chiweenie, Frankie, didn't take the news very well. She does not consider herself in any way overweight so she's rather upset about having to go on a diet. M is determined. She realizes the dangers lurking behind dog obesity and wants to keep the pack healthy and happy for as long as possible.
According to the dog vet, the chiweenie, has to lose ONE pound. One pound may not seem much to most but considering that the chiweenie's weight is only NINE pounds . . .

. . . it's a bit much. 

The "diet" was going well, until last Monday. M had been cutting back Frankie's caloric intake slowly but surely. On Monday we were moving so there were lots of people in our home and one of them left a bean burrito on the coffee table. Frankie assumed it was for her. M was livid but there wasn't much she could do short of wearing an oxygen mask and waiting it out. This was a first. Apparently the chiweenie will be honored by having her name added to the Counter Surfers' Hall of Fame.

"I would prefer dog treats to honor."

I feel for the chiweenie, a.k.a. the brindle burrito!

Twinkie

Guilty Or Not Guilty

Haven't you ever thrown a party that left you with food you had to get rid of? For us it's usually the cake. We're not big on sweets, plus this one was a chocolate cake which meant that we, the dogs, couldn't even have a taste--not that we didn't want one.

I asked the chiweenie to give me a lift up to the trash compactor, but she was squirming too much and I was sliding on her brindle furs. Linguini, our spotted senior dog and expert counter surfer, didn't face any such difficulty. Her trouble developed after she was discovered.

The trash compactor

"It wasn't me.

I believe it was the kittens."

I ask that you examine our senior dog's nose paint and body posture and tell us your honest opinion.

For the record, Linguini wasn't affected by the chocolate. She didn't get sick, there wasn't any dog diarrhea, heck, we watched her like hawks and she didn't even burp. No emergency dog vet visit this time.

Twinkie

Dog Obesity

The obesity rate in the U.S. is still growing dramatically. About one third of of american adults are indeed obese. Great news for dogs: get off the couch and walk your pooch. Canine obesity is a serious matter. If you care about dog health, read on.

There are two main actions one can take to curb obesity: Eat less, exercise more. Same exact principal applies to your canine companion. 

1. Adjust the amount of food you give your dog. 

2. Provide your dog with regular physical activities, such as walks (a couple of times a day if there is already an issue), dog hiking, dog parks… 

All dogs are susceptible to obesity, just like humans, however those that are fed high calorie diets (that includes table scraps I'm afraid), and those that do not get adequate amounts of exercise are at risk. There are some breeds, such as doxies, beagles, and labradors that are known to be predisposed. 

Fact: Obesity affects 20-40% of all American dogs

Visible Signs: visible body fat, not visible ribs, from above your dog the belly is bulging out

Clinical consequences: difficulty exercising, walking, getting up or down, difficulty berating, and canine arthritis (in other words, extra stress on the already inflamed joints)

Causes: too much food very little if any exercise

Organs affected: bones and joints, lungs, heart and potential diseases include canine diabetes

Exceptions to the rule: hypothyroidism, insulinoma, intestinal parasites, fluid in the abdomen, pregnancy

The majority of dog obesity can be easily treated at home, cutting back on your dog's caloric intake and increasing the exercise periods. If you have tried this simple solution and see no results, it is a good idea to visit your dog vet for a proper evaluation, including blood tests that can rule out hormonal and thyroid disease. The dog vet is also where you can purchase low calorie kibble, although having checked all the ingredients on those (mainly byproducts and lots of corn meal), I recommend to stay away and instead use a good quality dog food in slightly smaller portions. Some dogs love canned pumpkin, green beans, carrots . . . See if your dog likes those. I personally use all of the above including a small dollop of non fat yogurt for my barely obese senior dog. I know many people who simply cut back by a quarter of a cup per day the food intake on a larger dog and they have no problems. I use both of my suggestions: I substitute some of the reduced kibble with veggies and I cut back a little of the dogs' food. This way, my dogs never know they are on a diet! Do not ever put a dog on a crash diet. That can both shock his system and make him miserable. Long term but steady weightless is the goal. 

Table scraps and treats are generally bad for dogs, but especially bad for overweight dogs. Some dog owners also use a large portion of dog treats, disproportionate to their dog's overall daily caloric intake. Be careful with that. A treat is just a treat, not a meal. The good news for dogs is that nowadays you can find many low calorie dog treats available. You can also substitute store bought treats with boiled chicken cubes, celery with a taste of peanut butter to make it more desirable, and experiment with carrots and other safe vegetables. All our dogs are nuts about carrots. 

Two cases:

1. Our brindle chiweenie is almost two years old and she weights 9 lbs. A week ago, during her physical, the vet recommended she loses one whole pound! That is almost 10% of her body weight. How did we miss it? Because of her age. As she is still growing, she would one day look chubby and the next normal. Now that we heard the dog vet's warning, We're watching her like a hawk and monitoring her food intake more than we did in the past. 

2. Our dalmatian and german shorthaired pointer mix is slightly overweight. Since she's almost 11 years old, a senior dog, she is also suffering from dog arthritis. I have to keep her weight as low as possible.

For both these dogs, I do as I said from the start of this post: healthy diet, regular exercise, and creative low calorie dog treats. My dogs' health is of chief importance. 

Twinkie

Number One Reason I Do Not Like The Kittens

I, Frankie, the chiweenie, am mad--oh-so-mad. Ever since they brought Farrah, the feral pregnant cat home, I have had a bad feeling. I sense cat-astrophe. Things got worse after Farrah gave birth to her five adorable kittens. There's nothing cuter than a newborn and newborn kittens are near the top of that list, but all the dogs have to be quite and tip toe around Farrah's designated quarters. Add to that the fact that one day she shot out of her room and lunged at poor Linguini, the sixty pound dalmatian pointer mix. Soon after the kitten were born, my family built an outdoor cat enclosure and I'm afraid it's because some, hopefully not all of the newborn kittens, are here to stay. First, let me give you a sneak peak of the enclosure.

Outdoor Cat Enclosure

a.k.a The Cat Palace

Cat Enclosure on the left & Finch Cage on the right

Strategically located so that both species can get their exercise

Inside view of the outdoor cat enclosure

We will be adding colorful toys and beds and scratching surfaces soon

The outdoor cat enclosure was a minor annoyance. I had to hang out and watch M working for a day. I didn't get to go on a hike, but it was just one day, so I didn't mind much. Besides, I liked the fact that the cats would have something to do other than chase me, the brindle chiweenie around the house. Now, I've mustered the courage to speak of the unspeakable! 

The real reason I do NOT like the newborn kittens: 

I was used as a . . . DEMO kitten!!!

My otherwise beloved dog vet, used me, Frankie, a dog, a brindle chiweenie to be precise, as a means to demonstrate how to administer deworming medication for the kittens. 

Silly kittens. They're getting bigger and louder every day. I feel sorry for their mom. The following kitten video proves it. Turn the volume down.

Frankie

(Meow)

Dear Twinkie | A Dog Advice Column

A dog advice column

mayziegal asked...

Gosh, you are a Most Thorough advice giver. Maybe you should gets your own radio show! I think I have maybe suggested that before. I don't remember.

Anywho...here's my question for you. I would very much like to gets that CGC certificate thingie one day but, um, I gets a little nervous-like around doggies I don't know. And from what I've heard, that's part of the test. Do you thinks it would be possible to clep out of that part of it with a doggie I DO know? If not, how would you suggests I gets over my nerves in that pawticular area?

Wiggles & Wags,
Mayzie

PeeS. Are you EVER gonna name those baby kittehs?

TVT: Maybe your issues stem from the fact that you come for Collie-rado. Maybe they can all be solved with a bit of peanut butter or cheese after each class? I'm talking about dog training tips here, Mayzie. You have to first train your humans before you pass the Canine Good Citizen test. Once you've taught them the tricks you so rightfully deserve, start attending class. In the chiweenie's case, we didn't bribe (something very tempting) nor use a furiend. We did  however "use" the same doggie for practice. Since you're not going to get too close to the doggie, hold your breath and your pee, stay away from it's bum and you'll be just fine. Good luck to our future canine good citizen Wigglebutt!

About the kitten names: So far we've only used the calico kitten name suggestions. We've got the calico twins named Puddles and Pebbles. We're waiting for them to develop a personality (as if that's ever possible with cats!).

If cheese doesn't cut it one of those will help with the nerves

Dory and the Mama asked...

Another week of wonderful advice Miss Twinkie!!

Here is our question for next week, we are sorry but it is kitteh related. Will your Mama be looking for new homes for the kitties...or do you think you will be the proud ChiSister to the whole family???

Extra Smileys & Snuggles!
We think you may need them....lots

Dory, Jacob and Bilbo

TVT: Dear Dory, that question is a bit personal and particularly hard for me to answer. However, since you're an old friend, I'll give you a piece of my mind. My life is a cat-astrophe! M has got kittens in her brain all the time and she's threatening to keep them all. I say, nine cats are nine too many, but I'm losing the battle. I'm going to need the help of my friends to find homes soon or else. So, yes, I will most likely be a ChiSister to the whole family, but I won't be either proud or happy.

Please tell Bilbo not to look so shocked. I'm shocked enough as it is.

brooke asked...

Great advice Twink!

Our questions for you:
What does it mean if I dreamt Darwin was a baby elephant?
Also, is there a way to train her to not sniff people's crotches?

TVT: What does the dream mean? It means you have got to wake up. What is wrong with you people (including my M) that you have to humiliate us like that in public. Blog dog is not synonymous with laughing dog. Okay, so I've been putting up with whatever my M comes up with because I recognize I look a bit comical, but to take a glorious magnificent beauty like my majestic friend, Darnwin, and expose her like that? Please next time dream of her incompetent doctors as elephants and feel free to share. We can't wait!

About sniffing crotches. It is vital to our mental health. It is the polite thing to do for a dog. Those of us with good manners have to do the crotch-sniff. Now, if you don't like that, I suggest you have some of that homemade cheese Darwin is so fond of. Stick it in your pants and your guests will be left alone, completely alone.  

Ask your mom if she can find a better pastime

Sam and Pippen asked...

Twinkie,

Fantastic advice this week as always!

We need some advice... you may know that a certain someone named Puddles made a comment on our blog that resulted in us having a public BATH and a haircut. We have tried knocking on her front door to discuss the situation but Puddles refuses to answer fearing that we are up to no good. Do you have any advice for us on how else we can sneak into her house, preferably in the middle of the night when she's sound asleep?

Any help is much appreciated.

Sam and Pippen

TVT: I think that Puddles is in trouble with much of animal blog-land. Did you know she came over to my blog and asked that we name our firstborn kitten after her? And we did! And now we have to keep that one. Tsk tsp. And to think that she didn't mention meddling with my furiends' blogs in the "bad habits" section of her interview. I think that the only way to get to Puddles is directly, I mean via her girl. Anything that girl says is Puddles' command. You may chose to organize a coup in the middle of the night too, but again, through her girl. 

Shocking!

houndstooth asked...

Twinkie Van Twinkerson, we look forward to your advice column every week!

Now I have a most serious question to ask you! Mom and Dad have been doing all sorts of strange and mysterious things this week. They're talking about us all taking a road trip together on Saturday. What could this all be about? Why would they keep it a secret? I'm losing sleep over this!

TVT: Right about now, I'd be more concerned with the strange looking greyhound that claims to be your sister, but in any case. Humans can be mysterious at times. The problem is that they like this thing called a surprise, something we're not terribly fond of. Surprise, you're going to the dog vet. Surprise, you're getting a bath. Surprise, you're getting six new kitten siblings. Surprise, you're getting a new sister! See how it works? I realize your question has mostly been answered by now so hopefully you can get some rest, if Morgan lets you.

An interesting and rather unique looking pack of greyhounds

3 doxies asked...

Oh Twinkie you is so good ats this advice stuffs...even though you kinda lefts me hanging theres.
Okays, heres my question: what do I do when I haves somebuddies continuously knocking on my door at ALL hours? And they always seems to come as I am plotting "things" in my doxie brain.I sure hopes they know I am now officially a ground hoggie warrior.
Puddles

TVT: I know you can read, um, Puddles, but let me spell it out for you. The knocking? Sam and Pippen. You have some explaining to do. Just because your philosophy in life is to "kinda laughs with everbuddy else," does not mean everbuddy else likes it. Now Sam and Pippen deserver a public apology and the matter should be resolved asap. I hear they're about to take extreme measures, so I'd hurry if I were you. 

As for being a hoagie warrior, you only have your girl to thank for that. 

The Warriors

Lola asked...

Thank you for the valuable ear advice, Twinkie. I'm going to suggest we use that natural stuff instead of the stuff we're using now. Although I would prefer that my ears could be left alone entirely I guess that's not in the cards.

Now my new problem is that I seem to have gotten Bolo in a little trouble. I said I wished I could have my own kid and my humans say it's not gonna happen, so he tried to let me borrow his. Just for a while. Now he's getting the stinkeye from his Mom and he just loves his Mom. I feel so bad.
The kidlet seemed fine with the whole thing, I must say. You can see what I mean right here. What can I do to set things right?

thx much, Lola

TVT: The situation is sensitive alright. I mean, it was really sweet of Bolo to share, but humans are weird about their Puppies. I don't see why you can't proceed with your plan. We could always leave one of my kittens in Puppy's crib. They probably wouldn't notice. We'll get one of the fawn ones because of the hair color. As for Bolo, he's recovered just fine. He's busy thinking up a way to efficiently mark all of his cousins' beds. 

I think you've paid your dues already, be careful though because I heard that next time you're getting 6 seconds!

KB asked...

Hi Twinkie, This is K, the chocolate lab from the Rockies. You are so funny - my human is laughing and laughing. I have a question. I'm getting gray fur on my chin, and it makes my human start to worry about me getting old. How can I get rid of it? Fur dye? Magic Marker? What do you suggest?

Thanks,
K

TVT: Dearest K, no need for introductions amongst old furiends, unless of course you did it for our readers. First off, haven't you learned that it's a good thing to have a laughing human? When ours laughs it means we get extra dog treats-I have tested this over and over. So, you've got a few grey hairs and that's what has gotten you all upset. I believe that it shows when men and dogs get their fur died, therefore I would like to recommend a more cutting edge solution. Here it goes:

When in doubt, go all out!

Lorenza asked...

Hi, Twinkie!
Pawesome!
I have a question.
How can I ask to my mom to get me another soft pool? You know. She got a new one but it scares me a lot. I prefer the softy ones but bricks and birdies attack them! Help me please!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

TVT: Tsk tsp tsp. Are we a wee bit spoiled? I mean, you do realize your mom walked in the scorching heat for 14 blocks to get you your own pool? Well, she did. And what did you do? You snubbed it. Apparently you are so spoiled that I didn't even get a chance to respond to your inquiry. You got your way again. You managed to get your mommy to pull her hairs out the day she brought you the soft pool you so craved and jumped in the hard. 

Lorenza living the life, pffftt...

Khyra And Sometimes Her Mom asked...

May
The
Phloof
Be
With
Woo
!!!!!

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra
PeeEssWoo: Did woo pikhk my khytty yet?

TVT: I'm waiting for them to grow their PHLOOF so I can tell which one yours.

It is furry hard to pick for woo

Gnomebody asked...

Hi Twinkie -
What excellent advice you give. I had to ask Mommy was BS was - I still don't get it.

Mommy wanted me to ask for some advice - it's really hot right now here in the Midwest, and I really like to cool off my body by lying in a pool and then running inside, hopping up on Mommy's bed, and stretching out for a nice long nap (and of course, I lay my head on her pee-woh). Now, Mommy's all for staying cool, but she loses her cool when she finds her bed is completely wet from my generosity of making her beddie bye nice and chilly. What do I tell her???
Your Friend,
Riley
BooDee BooDah Tribe

TVT: I think you and your brother are already doing what you're supposed to. Humans, if I judge from mine, are forgetful. Distraction or destruction in your case, is the way to go and I know you're on it already. Keep it up and at the same time make sure mommy's bed remains nice and wet for the rest of the summer. We'll work on her winter treats later this year, kk?

The brilliant boodee boodah pair working on their skills

the booker man asked...

miss twinkie,
i asked my mama about BS, and i got in trouble! what gives?! :(((
*woof*
the booker man

TVT: No sh*t! Your momma royalty or something? How are we supposed to learn the facts of life if our parents can't explain them to us? Would your mom prefer you go to a peer for advice? What if you run with the wrong crowd as a result of this? Since I can't elaborate on BS on my G-rated dog advice column, let me at least give you a few quick examples of BS. BS is something you say when you step on a prickly cactus. BS is a good reply when made to take a bath. BS is the perfect response when you're lying in bed dozing happily and out of the blue momma says she's lost her kitchen craftiness. I think you get me now.

Cliffhangers such as the one you posted on yesterday make me want to say BS. You can't make us wait when you post about dog treats!

Now go take on the day!

Twinkie Van Twinkerson