Tall As a Tree

There are plenty of tall folks out there living a normal life, but our M always seems to run into issues that extend beyond her clumsiness. She's a rather tall gal surrounded by tree climbing cats. Recently she thought she was viscously attacked by Farrah, the pregnant cat we were supposed to foster. A careful breakdown of the situation and after talking to many cat savvy persons said otherwise. Farrah did not attack M. She tried to climb up her long leg. That was quite a relief.

Having just recently established that  M's leg doubles as a tree trunk, we were more entertained rather than shocked when Hank, the rhodesian ridgeback, a dog, got confused just like Farrah, the cat. 

The evidence is worth a thousand dog treats:

M's trunk

Hank

I asked M not to wash her pants that were saturated with the aroma of my guy, but for some reason, she didn't listen to me this time. I guess I need to train her better. 

Twinkie

Dear Twinkie | A Dog Advice Column

A dog advice column

Lola asked...

Twinkie, that was a very deep answer to my deep question about what humans really want. So you don't know either, right? We took your advice about the inside zoomies. It's really too hot to enjoy them outside even during the day. It's working out fine - for us. Today my question is about chewies. Why do my humans think that Franklin should have them, too? I think I've made myself clear that I get ALL the chewies, no matter how many there are and yet they continue to give one to him each time I get one. How do I get through to them that I've made this decision and it's final.

thanks much as always, Lola

TVT: Wrong, my friend. I know what humans want. It's the humans who are clueless. Twinkie Van Twinkerson knows, and when she doesn't, she researches. So, to your question now. 

I'm sorry, but it's too late. You had to have already trained your humans before Andy established himself in your home. But now you know what to do when you adopt a new lil' brother or sissy.

The ideal lil' bro

mayziegal asked...

Thank you, thank you, Twinkie, for your most excellent bachelorette planning advices. You wouldn't be interested in heading up the Chihuahua Fun Police, would you? Or do you just want to come and dance on the tables - um, I mean - sip tea delicately and Most Ladylike with the rest of us?

Wiggles & Wags,
mayzie

TVT: Um, no on working that night, but thank you for your vote of confidence in my guarding skills. I have purchased the most exquisite gown for the event therefore "tea" would be appropriate.

Mayzie practicing her own guarding skills

houndstooth asked...

Wise woofs yet again, Ms. Twinkerson!

I think I have a more serious problem than Morgan putting her paw on my back. Now it seems that she feels the need to put MY WHOLE HEAD in her mouth! How do I deter her from this craziness? Blueberry runs into her crate and closes the door so Morgan can't get in, but that leaves me out on my own!

Oh, and Lilac wanted me to ask you a question about that bachelorette party. She says she has a lot of green papers for the "policemen" but wants to know if it's okay to pull a few back out to reuse if she runs out. I'm not sure the bachelorette party is ready for her!

TVT: The situation with Morgan putting your entire head in her mouth does not compare with the Akita and German Shepherd mix that used to put my entire head and body in her mouth. Then she'd spit me out like I didn't taste delicious or something. In any case, sounds like you're having a ball over at your Houndstooth quarters. 

Lilac, is a smart gal! I am a green dog and appreciate Lilac's recycling vision. Lilac's novel idea is superb and a lesson to us all. 

Wise dog demonstrating superb dog training skills.

Notice how she's using the fan instead of the A/C? That's a green dog!

Sam and Pippen asked...

Twinkie,

Awesome advice as always!

We don't have a question this week, more of a clarification... you mentioned in your answer to us that we couldn't control an all-girl party... we assumed that if they are out of control, the more cheese and green papers for us! or are we wrong in that assumption?

Sam and Pippen

TVT: The girls have caught on, in case you missed Ms. Bunny's question. You can rest assured there will be no green papers nor cheese left sitting around. It'll all be put to good use, over and over again.

Sam and Pippen scheming futilely

Life With Dogs asked...

I'm still giggling at Madi's private quarters. Why am i hearing the theme song from the Jeffersons? :)

TVT: Your question sent me into a research frenzy. "Moving on up!" This is an advice column, my dear. Hearing tunes in your head is not for me to figure out, but I can recommend either sobering up or an excellent dog psychiatrist!

This photo speaks a thousand words

Frankie Furter asked...

Grrreat advice for Mango.
Hey did you know that I'm having a bachelor pawty??? We are gonna have a BLAST.. Baseball game, Air and water show... and bar hopping after that. I know the girrrls will be ok at their pawty.

TVT: Dude, the entire animal blog-dom knows about your ball and chain party. Is there anyone in this room who does NOT know about Frankie's Doggie's Gone Wild party?

Don't forget your handcuffs!

Frankie the Chiweenie asked...

I wanted to give you a reminder to post about HoneyBear! Oh, and don't forget to mention one last time, Sarge's walk!

TVT: Gee, thanks, what would we do without you, brindle furs? Okay, HoneyBear is fairly new to our world and she's a very special girl. She's been through a lot and is getting her leg surgery on August 5th. You can easily get caught up on her blog.

HoneyBear could use our group-paw-hug!

As for Sarge's "Walking With the Herd" march, that's coming up on August 7th. Hurry up and get your fluffy and not so fluffy tails down there, either in person or virtually. 

Support saving animals (us, gulp) from euthanasia!

Twix asked...

My question is: Who won the case of M vs M? And what was decided about those adorable kittens?
(I, Twix, do not think kittens are the least bit adorable but since I have paws and not fingers, I have to let Mom type what she would like)
Snuggles,
Twix

TVT: I can always count on my good ol' pal to open up a can of worms. I am not happy to report that M lost. In the process she gave away two of her beloved kittens: Teddy Smudge and Lolita. Let me explain for those who have been following the story.

M took two of the kittens to the vet last week. At the lobby, she met a girl with a dog that appeared to be 100 human years old. The girl asked M if she was giving away any kittens. M said NO. Then M got her head off her … and asked the girl about her dog. The girl said the dog was being put down. He was almost 18 years old. The girl had also had to put down her 12 year old cat a week earlier due to illness. M though about it all night long and the next day, when she took in the rest of the kittens, she had the vet's office call the poor girl. Within minutes, the girl came down. M wanted to make her feel better, plus she'd be getting rid of all the annoying folks who were rather persistent she could not keep all the kittens. M had Puddles, Lolita, and Teddy Smudge with her that day. Puddles was not an option. She and M are already tight, plus she was named by Abigail, a precious friend, so she gave the girl the other two kittens. The end and the beginning.

M got home feeling miserable. Momma cat started looking for her kittens. She wailed for a day and a half looking for them. M felt like a world class criminal. A couple of days later, both M and momma cat had reached a decision. No more listening to friendly advice. We're a family now and that's the way it's going to be. All the remaining kittens are here to stay along with their nursing cat mom. The end. 

Our beloved Lolita

Our beloved Teddy Smudge

May you have a beautiful long life filled with joy at your new home!!! We miss you and we hope to see you again some day (we do share the same zip code).

Now, go take on the day!

Twinkie Van Twinkerson

The Blur

So far, I've tried my best to use the best photos available for my demonstrations, due to technical difficulties and speeds exceeding that of light, I'm afraid I have to use less than clear photos. I just want to share some playtime photos of Shandy (the icelandic sheepdog) and the rhodesian ridgeback twins, Hank and Sue.

Wise senior dog chose to be the referee.

Not so wise chiweenie and teacup chihuahua, became active participants to this dangerous game.

Twinkie: "Ehem . . . Hanky, are you forgetting your true love?"

Hank: "No, baby. We're good. I was just messing around."

After incredible zoomies, we visited our pond.

Yes, we stepped on the fish.

And right after that, we re-zoomed our games.

We had a blast!

Right after our guests left us, the chiweenie and I collapsed and took a long nap--after a lovely meal. We woke up just in time. M had just hit the bed. The chiweenie and I resumed our zoomies on her belly. She had to resort to rawhide dog chews. Mission accomplished.

Twinkie

Designer Dog or M-u-t-t? | Shandy

Our beloved furiend Shandy, aka Sandwiches, came by for a visit yesterday. Shandy is a rescue dog found wondering the streets as a pup. Within a couple of days, Shandy was found by a friend of M's who gave her her forever home. Shandy's got it made. She is loved and cared for. Her new family did not care about trivial details, like breeds, but they've been wondering and even toyed with the idea of getting a DNA test. I also recently heard that Shandy is on a diet of best quality kibble along with boiled chicken and lots of veggies. I wish M would cook for me like she used to, but apparently she only cooks when I'm sick. In any case, here's our Shandy when she came over to visit:

Shandy when she got to our home for a visit. She is always clean and well groomed.

Isn't she stunning?

The brindle chiweenie and I were a bit hesitant about greeting her at first,

but she's got such a kind smile.

We played a lot and marked our entire yard as if it wasn't ours. We drank fresh water out of our pond and ran and ran . . . It was so much fun!

Here's Shandy again, this time before her departure.

Tsk-tsk, what a dirty dog. Doesn't her mom every bathe her?

Come visit soon, Sandwiches!

Shandy's mom coincidentally figure out her breed. Shandy is no designer dog. She looks therefore she must be an Icelandic Sheepdog! Good thing she didn't attempt to herd the Twink. I may be tiny, but I do not get bossed around. So, Shandy's not even a designer dog. Now, we can't help but wonder, what was an Icelandic Sheepdog doing roaming the streets of Pasadena as a stray. Humans!

Twinkie  

The Dreaded Dog Cone

My pack and I were out for a visit with a good and savvy dog friend of ours we often run to for advice. Our friend shocked us by admitting she didn't know there was an alternative to the evil dog cone, so I'm dedicating today's post to all the poor dogs that are forced to wear the lampshade. I would like to offer you a few alternatives.

Beyond the traditional clear KONG E-Collar for Dogs, that comes in sizes small (for cats too), medium, large, and extra large, there is a thing called a Comfy Cone. The comfy cone is not comparable to the old fashioned lamp shade dogs used to have to wear, the kind that would get stuck in doorways. The comfy cone is flexible and lightweight and much easier on your dog.

Another alternative for small dogs and even cats is the Trimline Veterinary Soft Recovery Collar. Again, a soft pliable collar that is gentle on the patient. This collar is also available in a range of sizes from puppies and kittens, for medium and large dogs, for small and medium dogs, and for large dogs.

Another humane and dog friendly cone, also known as a recovery collar, is the ElizaSoft that you can find in XS, Small, Medium/Large, and Large.

There are also inflatable dog cones such as the ProCollar Inflatable Elizabethan Collar you can find online as well as at many pet stores (such as Petco) near you.

These are only a few of the alternatives to the traditional uncomfortable dog cone. There are many more to suit your dog's life style.

Twinkie

Small Dog Treats

Small dogs are easy when it comes to treats. Think about it, a large or giant dog breed will demolish a solid piece of anything in a few minutes whereas a small dog will take much longer thus making most treats more cost effective and safer. I therefore picked three tested small dog treats that are my personal favorites to share with my small dog friends.

Pizzle, or bully stick is at the top of my list. It's a long lasting treat that has few calories and one of the safest small dog treats. It does not splinter and since it's so much work to consume (usually lasts days or weeks) you have the chance to remove the last small piece before it becomes dangerous. The one I usually buy is the All Natural 6 inch best bully sticks.

Duck or chicken strips are my second favorite treat. They don't last as long as pizzle and they are high in calories, considering the size of the small dog in relation to the chicken strip, but we break them in half on thirds for that reason. This is a highly digestible treat that does not pause any threat to most small dogs. My favorite chicken strips are the Waggin Train Natural Chicken Jerky Tenders and the Waggin Train Duck Jerky Tenders.

My final small dog treat pick is a old time favorite among dog chews: Cow Hooves. Cow hooves can last several months depending on the size of the dog. Many come pre-filed making them even more appealing because of their smell. My favorites are the Ranch Rewards Pork Filled Hooves Dog Treat and the Cheese and Bacon Filled Cow Hooves.

Small dogs may have their issues, but finding the appropriate treats isn't one of them. When it comes to small dog treats and dog chews, small dogs are easy and economical to please.

Twinkie

M vs. M

All rise for the honorable judge. Please be seated. The defense may make opening statements.

M's defense attorney: Your honor, everyone surrounding Ms. M is opposed to her keeping all of the kittens including their mom.  

Prosecution: Ehem. I would like the cons stated for the record. M has three cats already and they don't get along. She also has three dogs that occasionally get attacked by the cats. If she keeps the entire litter and their mother, M is going to end up with NINE cats. No outdoor cat enclosure is going to save her. 

Suspect #1

Name: Trouble

Age: 48 days

Color: tuxedo kitten

Race: feline

Gender: male

PROS: Trouble is special. He's the only male. He has a beauty mark and a goatee. He eats out of M's hand. He runs to greet M every time she enters the nursery. Trouble can do the splits.

Suspect #2

Name: Alley Alarm aka Allie

Age: 48 days

Color: pointed kitten

Race: feline

Gender: female

PROS: Allie is a riot. She's the wildest of the bunch and she keeps changing colors. She's got white and fawn toes. M loves a good challenge.

Suspect #3

Name: Lolita aka Loli

Age: 48 days

Color: calico

Race: feline

Gender: female

PROS: She's the baby. Loli spends her days on her back sucking on her toes. Sometimes, she rushes and attacks her siblings. M finds this behavior adorable. 

Suspect #4

Name: Teddy Smudge (did somebody mention cute kitten names?)

Age: 48 days

Color: pointed dilute calico kitten

Race: feline

Gender: female

PROS: Her name, for starters. She's also a quiet kitten that gets along with everyone. She's got a cute goatee, and amazing markings.

Suspect #5

Name: Puddles, named after you-know-who

Age: 48 days

Color: calico kitten

Race: feline

Gender: female

PROS: She is nuts over M. Puddles runs to greet M and then rubs herself all over her purring. She was the first of the kittens to purr at the human touch. She loves kitten treats. 

Suspect #6

Name: Farrah, aka Mama

Age: under a year most likely

Color: charcoal and white with beautiful markings

Race: feline

Gender: female

PROS: M bonded with Farrah the minute she arrived. Even though Farrah attacked M, rather aggressively causing quite a bit of damage, M feels Farrah was just being protective of her angels. She's worried about her the most since she may be the hardest to socialize in our multi-pet cross breed home. 

At the moment, M cannot bear the thought of breaking up this bundle of cuteness, help her do the right thing.

Defense and  Prosecution attorneys rest their case. It's up to you, the jury now. 

Twinkie